Stede took a deep breath as he stood in front of the captain’s cabin. He had finally made it home. Well, almost. He had made it back to his ship, but home … home was on the other side of this door. Home was Ed.
Stede wanted nothing more than to apologize to him, to tell him how sorry he was, how much he loved him. But to do that, he had to enter the captain’s cabin first.
He gently knocked on the door, but there was no reply. “Ed?” Nothing. “Edward? I’m back. I’m so, so sorry. I know I made a huge mistake. Can I please come in so I can properly apologize to you?” Silence.
Stede sighed. He knew winning Ed back wouldn’t be easy, not after what he had done to him, but still … he had hoped Ed would at least say something. Even if it was just “fuck off.”
Just when Stede decided to give Ed some time and try again later, he heard a muffled sound from inside the cabin. He put his ear to the door and listened intently. Was that… crying?
Alarmed, Stede opened the door and entered the room. He felt bad for coming in without Ed’s permission, but he would feel worse if he just left him there, alone and crying. He never wanted to leave Ed alone again.
He looked around the cabin, this beautiful room that once belonged to him, and almost gasped in shock. Everything was gone. His books, his clothes, all the little knick-knacks and trinkets he had collected over the years… Even the light seemed to be gone from the room.
But that was not what truly shocked him.
There on his bed, huddled in the corner and crying, was Ed.
Stede didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what to do.
“Ed…?” He breathed out softly. He wanted to come closer, he wanted to wrap his arms around Ed and never let go again, but he didn’t dare to.
“Please don’t go away this time…,” Ed whispered, more to himself than to Stede.
“Ed, I’m so, so sorry. I promise I won’t leave you again.”
“You always say that.”
“I…” What? Always?
“Ed?”
“Every time you come back, you promise that you will stay, and then you’re gone again.”
“Ed, you’re not making any sense.”
“I’m sorry…,” Ed… whimpered?
Stede’s confusion changed to worry. Throwing caution to the wind, he quickly crossed the room and kneeled beside Ed.
“Ed. Edward, please look at me.”
When he finally did, Stede’s heart broke. Ed’s face was covered in kohl, and Stede could clearly see the tear tracks on his cheeks. His hair was a mess, matted and tangled in knots. But his eyes were the worst. Stede had expected to see anger in those eyes. Hurt. Maybe even hatred. He wasn’t prepared for Ed’s beautiful brown eyes to be wide and glassy, unfocused, and full of fear.
“I’m so sorry, please don’t go away again…” Ed curled in on himself.
Stede carefully reached out to push Ed’s hair back from his face, then placed his hand on his forehead. Well, that certainly explained things. “Ed, darling, you’re burning up!”
“I’m sorry…,” Ed muttered again.
“Hey, no, no, no, it’s not your fault.” Stede gently cupped Ed’s cheek with his hand. “It’s not your fault.”
This was not how Stede had imagined their reunion. Ed was clearly sick and delirious with fever. No matter how he felt about Stede right now, he needed help.
“I know I really hurt you, Ed, but you’re very ill, so will you please let me take care of you? Please?”
Ed gave him a tiny nod, and Stede couldn’t help but sigh in relief. “Thank you.” He really didn’t want to leave Ed alone like this.
“I will get you some water and something more comfortable to wear, okay?” All this leather definitely wasn’t helping with the fever. After handing Ed a glass of water, Stede headed towards the auxiliary wardrobe, hoping some of his robes had survived whatever happened to the cabin, but suddenly, Ed grabbed his wrist desperately and held him back. “Don’t go.”
“It’s okay, Ed, I’ll be back before you know it,” Stede murmured, gently prying Ed’s fingers away and kissing his hand. Ed still looked unconvinced. “I won’t leave you this time, I promise.”
Slowly, Ed let go of him, and Stede hurried to the auxiliary wardrobe, not wanting to leave Ed alone for longer than he had to.
To Stede’s surprise, the auxiliary wardrobe looked exactly as he had left it. There were his winter jackets, his summer linens, his … oh.
His yellow battle jacket was lying on the floor, crumpled and tear-stained, surrounded by numerous blankets. Ed must have built himself a little nest here after he came back to the Revenge. After Stede had abandoned him.
Stede felt his eyes fill with tears. What had he done? How could he have hurt Ed so badly? Why—No. Stede didn’t have time for this. The guilt could wait. Ed needed him right now.
Stede quickly grabbed his most comfortable robes and softest blankets and returned to Ed’s side.
“Here, love, we need to get you out of those leathers.” Well, not how he had imagined saying this sentence either. “I got you some nice robes to wear. Just put one of these on instead, I’m certain they will make you feel more comfortable.”
Stede sheepishly turned around to give Ed some space. When he had finally put the robe on, Ed staggered towards Stede, letting out a small whimper as he leaned against his chest and closed his eyes, his fever present even through Stede’s shirt. “I know, darling,” Stede murmured. “You can rest now, I promise.”
After wrapping Ed up in his softest blankets, Stede fetched a pail of water and two cloths. “Here, this should help with your fever.” He placed a cool cloth on Ed’s forehead and used the other to gently wipe away the kohl from his fevered face. “There you are,” he whispered softly when he could finally see Ed—not Blackbeard, not the Kraken, Ed. “I missed you so much.”
Ed gave him a shaky smile at that, but suddenly, he started shivering violently and hid under the blankets. “Stede,” he whimpered feverishly, “I’m so cold… I think I’ll freeze…” Stede brushed his hand against Ed’s forehead with a sigh. “I don’t think freezing is something you need to worry about anytime soon, darling.”
“Can you hold me? Please?”
Stede froze.
“Are you sure?” he asked softly.
“Stede, please, I’m so cold...”
Well, he couldn’t argue with that, could he? Not when Ed looked so tired and helpless. Stede climbed into bed next to him and carefully wrapped an arm around Ed, who immediately snuggled closer to Stede. “Warm,” he sighed happily and closed his eyes. Stede could only agree—Ed’s skin was so warm it was practically burning. And yet, this was strangely comfortable. Holding Ed like this felt … right.
Just when Stede thought that Ed had finally fallen asleep, he heard a soft whisper.
“Thank you.”
“Ed, you don’t have to thank me for taking care of—“
“No, I mean for … for coming back. For real this time.”
Stede’s eyes filled with tears again as he ran his hand through Ed’s hair. “I’m sorry it took me so long.”
“But you’re here now.”
Stede pulled Ed closer and nodded. “I’m here now. And I will never leave again.”
A few minutes later, Ed was fast asleep in Stede’s arms, snoring softly and holding Stede tightly.
Stede couldn’t help but smile. He was finally home.